Sunday, November 30, 2014

pie in the face


 
I asked Brant if he was frustrated with me and all the health stuff, if it was putting too much on him.  In Brant fashion he said “I hate Lyme, Jana I love you they are not the same”.   To him it is that simple I do a decent job of separating the two or at least avoiding having them together.  Separating the two that is the emotional aspect I have been avoiding addressing. Really it has been an emotional battle a different sort of self-discovery.  I use all the avoidance techniques possible but then it comes and hits ME in the face.  I like to make pie, it is therapeutic and with volleyball over I guess I am missing therapy. So I guess I will hash it out on my blog.  I didn’t want to admit it, I was going to have a good enough day to make it happen, I bought the ingredients it is mind over matter and I kept telling myself I can do this.  Into the pie crust I went my favorite part, only it wasn’t therapeutic at all it hurt, and then it hurt my heart and tears don’t mix well with pie crust, I had to admit I couldn’t do it.  Heath rescued me he mixed the pie crust, he kept asking "does it look right mom" but I couldn’t see much through my tears.  The crust turned out fine Rianne did the fillings.   They weren’t pretty but they tasted great.  If I wouldn’t have been so consumed with my self-pity I would have some pictures.  I guess the thing that really hits me in the face these are NOT new symptoms I have had all of them before just not all at once.    
 
So this holiday it was winning the faceoff.  The new symptom broke me, thrown in my face through the holiday.  The new one is the throwing up.  The some days of September when I can’t keep down my pills has taken a turn to nearly every day.  It is bulimia with no weight loss benefit in fact gaining weight BLAHHH.  Just to save face I agreed to let Brant officially share the news it is Lyme not me, although I am feeling it!      

Gratitude in all things even when it is pie to the face…        We did get to go to my favorite place on earth!  Kanab did not disappoint perfect weather the two best fall sports in the world with family and food!    
 

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Panther Tracks


This year I did a train analogy for each game I enjoyed the motivational moments.  The first warning you have that a train is coming is the whistle, which is all the other team’s we will face get too, from the first blow of the whistle, it is on.  I shared why I was all aboard this season, that I felt tied to these girls with railroad ties.   I gave them boarding pass for a winning destination.  And tried to motivate them to TRAIN:  T.EAM’S R.ELENTLESS A.TTITUDE  I.NTESITY  N.OW.   They started the season 4-0.  The steam engine is considered the most powerful idea in the world.  No one person invented the steam engine. It was a case of many small inventions being put together until a specific need was met.  Steam engine was the first form of human generated power. With it, you could power a locomotive, and pull hundreds of tons at high speed.  Steam engine not brilliant inspiration on the part of an individual, but the combined efforts of many people, each building on what someone else had discovered.  Steam engines are powered with water and fire.  Put your heads together and go full steam ahead!  They lost a little steam but learned lose and win as a team that is what I know about us ;)

Then with a lucky penny they shook it off and crushed   the next 2 teams they were loaded with panthers and leaving tracks stepping into victory.  After a long week something switched the other team had a switchman like this:  A man worked in the head office of one of the railroads. One day he received a telephone call from his counterpart in Newark, New Jersey, who said that a passenger train had arrived without its baggage car. The patrons were angry. They discovered that the train had been properly made up in Oakland, California, and properly delivered to St. Louis, from which station it was to be carried to its destination on the east coast. But in the St. Louis yards, a switchman had moved a piece of steel just three inches. That piece of steel was a switch point, and the car that should have been in Newark, New Jersey, was in New Orleans, Louisiana, thirteen hundred miles away.  We had reached a low point, we are in the heal position,  which is when the engine is loading up, when the coal is being shoveled into the fire Chugga Chugga we had to dig out from a loss which is what they CHOO-CHOOsed to do.  Learched forward got fired up and blew away the next 3 teams. 

For the big Flag High game I let them know: Our track always goes through Flag High and each of our Railroad ties include this as a Winning stop.  From the first whistle blow, we are in pursuit of it.  I am certain you have the winning ticket, we have loaded up for it.  They will put things in our path I know it will take a lot of steam but we can crush them.  You are the part of flipping that switch and our record is about to flip to 10! I think we CAN, the chugga- chugga choo- choo it is up to you!  We are Wound to Win!  WIN will come when we link with WORK.   W has more points at the top but it will take some climb to end up on top but I know these Panthers and they can Climb!  I am wound up for the Win Let’s get to work and ride this TRAIN to a W.  Although we didn’t come through with the W I felt like the track from last year was cleared.  They came back from the loss on fire winning their next 4 matches and beating the next team in one match 25-3 and knocking off the #1 ranked team!   I gave them a little reminder with personal crossing sign reminding them they were crossing into heavy competition.  Our train stopped traffic and crossed through with a BIG win!  

Like the polar express we kept the hot streak coming not to let it cool we set our standard just like a train.  The track is exactly four-foot, eight-and-a-half-inches wide. That standard was set by George Stephenson, A mine worker he worked in different mines the width of the rails varied from mine to mine since they didn't share tracks.  He simply chose to make the rails for his project 4-foot, eight ½ inches wide.  Train tracks that run across highest peaks and through valleys have that standard.  We set the standard by how we choose to play from the highest ranked team to the lowest, our standard should not change.

As the season came to a close we ended up 13-4 with an  8-1 home record, Then we came through the Tunnel at Sate.   We finished with a 14-5 record.  When it was all over and we all came through our arms came up with 5th or 6th place finish at state.      


This is not the season I wanted it was the season I needed.  While I wanted to come back and thought it was for the girls, through the course of the season I realized I needed it more for me.  I watched these seniors through 3 coaching changes, I wanted them to have some consistency.  What I didn’t realize is I needed the consistency of coaching more than they needed me. Coaching volleyball is just a part of me, It has been something I do but this season did something for me.  I live for the strategy for the stats and even the struggle to improve or get better.  .
When I received my treatment plan (strategy) for beating Lyme  and I have watched my numbers fluctuate like our (stats).  Things I thought I could beat have been set backs and fighting away from home when a win seemed impossible has come through. 

My treatments have paralleled our season like a perfectly spaced railroad track.  It really has been my therapy, maybe that is why I am struggling with the end of the track.  This has been my source of balance.  I am a little scared to be without it, holding me up making me push through.  I will Need to TRAIN and stay on track big wins are just around the bend.   Llife is like an old-time rail journey—delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is enjoying the ride.  Thanks for the ride panthers I have really enjoyed it truly therapeutic for me!


I was so grateful that as Katie’s first coach I was able to say a few words at her division 1 signing!  I have been so blessed to coach her!  Now I can be a bit COCKY well for a minute club season is just around the corner.     

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Stinkin' Sweet Halloween

 We kept Halloween pretty simple this year. 
Rianne was sweet grapes Heath was a stinkin’ spider.   
I was a sweet flower and Bennett was a stinkin’ cute skunk. 
Quick trunk or treat and a few trick or treat doors.  Bennett loves to say “ahhh scary” and make ghost faces. 
If he sees anything Halloween (pumpkins, ghosts, skeletons etc.) he points and says “boo”.  It is a holiday all for him funny faces and candy!